I write this post because when I was single, I was always looking for sound advice from those who had figured it out, and I always felt let down in some way. Either the person giving the advice had a relationship that ultimately ended. Or their advice felt very unreachable and inaccessible. I also read and personally received lots of suggestions and performed almost every suggestion I ever received, all to no avail. Finally, after a certain point, I just stopped reading articles like this because I was so frustrated and depressed about my situation, that I actually felt worse hearing hopeful hints of advice from smug relationship-y people. If you are at that point, or if you are before or after that point, this article still might be for you. I will give you the hard (but loving) truth and I hope that in this truth, you will actually find the hope you need to keep moving forward, taking deliberate and necessary action to finally end the hell of cyclical singleness.Continue reading CALLING ALL SINGLE LADIES LOOKING FOR LOVE
I will be turning 41 in four days and have been reflecting back on the last year, noticing all of the changes and attempting to mentally compile a list of things I have learned. I feel like I’m coming up a bit short, but I am going to take an honest stab at this anyway.Continue reading WHAT I LEARNED DURING MY YEAR OF BEING 40
“I am in love with what we are, not what we should be.” -Ke$ha, Animal
I love Kesha in all her forms. I loved her when she was Ke$ha and I love her now that she’s Kesha. The first time I heard the song Animal, quoted above, these first lines of the song hit me really hard, and I remember thinking, “I wish I felt that way, but I don’t.” Continue reading THE RUG: A TEACHING TOOL FOR LOVE, ACCEPTANCE, AND LETTING GO
I have just returned from an evening drive and feel exhilarated and open. Let me back up a bit. Continue reading DEATH AND MAGIC: LETTING GO OF THE OLD TO BRING IN THE NEW
The Goddess Attainable has been silent since the COVID-19 outbreak began, but she feels the need to emerge at this time. For one thing, I (switching from third person to first person now) was really struggling to find my own balance with all of it, and I don’t find it useful to create blog posts when I’m a mess. Continue reading THE GODDESS ATTAINABLE IN QUARANTINE
I recently celebrated my 40th birthday (September 19th) and I thought it might be nice to compile a list of things I have learned thus far. Forty years is not immensely impressive, but it’s also not nothing. It’s four decades (holy crap) and includes childhood, puberty, and the terrible twenties (I was miserable in my twenties). Once I reached my thirties, things markedly leveled off. I can recall a moment (I was living in New York City, despairing, and searching for relief from the darkness I had been feeling for the extent of my entire life, reading Happiness by Matthieu Ricard) when I was hit with the thought that maybe there is hope after all and that my life isn’t going to continue to be a series of dramatic passageways through various versions of hell. I still don’t know if this realization came from the book or from the fact that I was finally through my twenties, but either way, that moment became a turning point for me. To know that life might be something more than just struggle upon struggle felt like such a relief and kept me motivated to continue on my path.
Have you ever been in a relationship and had sex with your partner when you didn’t want to? I can’t imagine that any woman reading this (or even any woman not reading this) would answer no. For women especially, this is just something that we have been conditioned to do, and I think all of us have experienced at one time or another, having sex with our partner when we weren’t in the mood. Continue reading RELATIONSHIP SEX: HOW TO FEEL CONSISTENTLY POSITIVE ABOUT SEX WITH YOUR PARTNER AND NEVER, EVER DREAD THE ACT
I had a revelation last night when I asked for help from The Goddess in a moment of need. First, let me back up and tell you how this all came about. Continue reading IS YOUR CHILDHOOD SELF RUNNING YOUR LIFE?
I think it is a safe assumption that every human being in the world needs and wants love. And it is also safe to assume that many of us do not always receive the kind of love and/or the amount of love we want and need. We might have had a fantastic childhood with loving parents, but maybe we were teased as children and that may have stripped us of a portion of our love quotient. Or maybe our parents kinda sucked and we learned to depend on our friends, getting by, but still suffering from a deep love depletion. Either way, most of us in our adult lives have hopefully found ways to get the love we need and want, but there are always gaps and cracks lurking within our emotional topography, and love-lack is a fact of being human. Continue reading THE TRUTH ABOUT THERAPY
As difficult as it is for a woman to define herself, know who she is, and feel good about herself and her life without a man; it’s equally as difficult for a woman not to lose herself, not to give away her power, and not to disappear completely when she’s with a man. Continue reading WHEN A GODDESS MEETS A MAN